My dearest Zoey,
“Let me tell you something you already know- The world ain’t all sunshine and rainbows. It is a very mean and nasty place, and I don’t care how tough you are, it will beat you to your knees and keep you there permanently if you let it. You, me or nobody is gonna hit as hard as life, But its not about how hard you hit, its about how hard you can get hit, and keep moving forward. How much you can take, and keep moving forward. That’s how winning is done…Now if you know your worth, then go out and get your worth. But you gotta be willing to take the hits, and not be pointing your fingers and saying you ain’t where you wanna be cause of him, or her, or nobody. Cowards do that and that ain’t you, your better then that!” – Rocky Balboa
This working out takes…dedication. It really does.
To get to where I want to be, it will take dedication. There can be days of failure, of disappointment, of discouragement, but as long as you are consistent, as long as you stay dedicated, these days will come and pass and leave little imprint on you except to show you what you have over come.
You have to dedicate. And in the good name of our one and only “Rocky”, You gotta be willing to take the hits! The hits for me are mostly time related. Taking the hits in my life means getting up at 3:45 am to go to the gym and bust my ass, knowing I won’t see the result of this workout for another four or five months, but I will feel exhausted by 3pm and I will feel sore all day tomorrow. The hits for me are passing on the cakes, the donuts, the cookies at work for a set of killer abs that are hidden somewhere under this post baby gut. The hits for me is passing up most of any extra free time I have to prep my meals for the week, to budget out how we will pay for expenses and nursing school, to create a new work out plan, etc, etc, etc..
This is not as hard as it sounds. Its harder. There are countless nights where I cover my whole body up, almost hiding from your dad because I don’t want him to see me as this ‘work in progress’. There are moments of not even wanting to look in the mirror, step on a scale or think about food. There are days where I cry on your dad’s chest, questioning if I have what it takes to live the life I desire. Can I really achieve a set of legs I am proud of? Can I really compete in a show next year? Can I really go to school, work and be a mom and fitness athlete? He always finds a way to re-ignite the fire. To get the spark blazing again. I consider this man, your dad, a major blessing. He contributes to my life in ways that no one has yet been able to. To get me to believe in myself and keep going, to fill me with the fire again. An immeasurable blessing.
So the hits for me is passing up free time for a dream that exists in the future. And I wont get there until I get there. And getting there requires dedication of conscious daily decisions. Making healthy choices, making the moves at the gym, pouring my thoughts and soul into my journal. I have to be willing to sweat and run and feel the burn, knowing it will be months until it just begins to pay off. I have to be willing to get up earlier then the ass crack of dawn basically, to get in my work outs. I have to be uncomfortable until I get comfortable. I have to be unconfident until I feel confident. I have to work hard and dedicate to a lifestyle that I know will pay off “some day”. Eventually.
But, I AM willing to take the hits.
Because I believe in me. In my heart, my vision.
So, just, always believe. And when you need someone to re-ignite your flame, I will always be that passion for you.